How to cope with caregivers' stress: 8 tips to find relief
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, MBA
Caregiver stress is real, and it can take a toll on your wellbeing. Learn what it is, why it happens, and 8 mindful ways to ease the overwhelm.
Caring for someone—whether it’s an aging parent, a sick partner, or a child with special needs—can be one of the most selfless and beautiful things a person can do. It’s also, unfortunately, one of the most tiring. The role of caregiver may start as just “helping out”, but before you know it, your own needs are shuffled to the back burner to make time for doctor’s appointments, grocery runs and pharmacy visits.
Because no one really prepares you for what it feels like to care for someone full time and how to take care of yourself while doing it. There’s no manual for balancing it all, and yet, so many feel like they should be able to handle it.
The stress that comes along with caregiving is very real, and it’s not something you should just push through. Your wellbeing matters too and if you’ve been feeling like you’re running on empty or headed towards burnout, there are ways you can find relief. Here’s what you need to know about caregiver stress so that you can offer the same support to yourself that you’re offering your loved ones.
What is caregiver stress?
Caregiver stress is exactly what it sounds like. It’s the weight of continuously being responsible for another person’s wellbeing, while also trying to take care of your own life. It’s the exhaustion that lingers no matter how much you sleep, and the emotional toll of watching someone you love struggle.
At first, helping to support someone you love might feel manageable and maybe even rewarding. But as the days wear on, those responsibilities can start to stack up and you may notice it begin to take a toll.
Caregiving often comes with practical tasks like meals, medication, and doctor’s appointments, but it can also come with a relentless mental checklist and the pressure to always be strong in the face of difficulty. In other words, it’s a lot.
Unfortunately, even with all this stress, many caregivers feel guilty admitting that they’re struggling because so much of their experience is rooted in love. With that said, acknowledging this stress doesn’t mean you love the person any less. It just means that you’re human.
Reasons for caregiver stress
Most people don’t fully understand the stress of caregiving until they’re deep in it. Here is a breakdown of some common stressors caregivers experience:
Physical demands: Lifting, assisting, and managing daily care can really take a toll on your body.
Emotional strain: Watching a loved one struggle with illness or aging can be very heartbreaking.
Lack of personal time: Caregivers often put their own needs last, which can lead to isolation and even exhaustion.
Financial pressures: Medical bills, time off from work, and caregiving expenses can quickly add up and can also add a lot of mental strain.
Unrealistic expectations: Many caregivers feel pressure to “do it all” without help and without complaint, which can really do a number on their mental health.
10 symptoms of caregiver stress
Sometimes caregiver stress can hit like a ton of bricks. Other times, it can sneak up quietly until you suddenly find yourself crying at less than ideal times. Some common symptoms that your’re dealing with caregivers stress are:
Constant exhaustion: You always feel drained, no matter how much sleep you get.
Irritability and mood swings: Small things set you off, and your patience feels nonexistent.
Physical symptoms: You’re experiencing frequent headaches, stomach issues, or body aches.
Forgetfulness and brain fog: You have trouble concentrating, or staying organized.
Guilt, resentment, or hopelessness: It feels like nothing you do is enough or that you’re stuck.
Withdrawal from loved ones: Suddenly you’re ignoring texts, and losing interest in your hobbies.
Getting sick more often: Stress can weaken your immune system and can leave you rundown.
Changes in eating or sleeping: You’re skipping meals, stress-eating, or struggling with insomnia.
Feeling trapped: No matter how badly you need a break, you can’t seem to step away.
Thoughts of escape or self-harm: If you feel overwhelmed and like you’re about to break, reach out for help. You’re not meant to carry all of this alone.
How to relieve caregiver stress: 8 ways to cope
Unlike a chaotic and stressful week that eventually ends, caregiving often stretches on, and demands more and more of you. The truth is that no matter how much you care, you can’t keep on pushing or you’re most likely going to break.
The longer you ignore your own needs, the harder caregiving can become for both you and the person you’re caring for. You need to make time to focus on your wellbeing, so you’re able to keep supporting others.
Here are eight practical ways to relieve your caregiver stress and help you feel a little lighter.
1. Accept that you can’t do it all
Remind yourself that you’re not superhuman. You can’t be everything to everyone, and that’s okay. Accepting this doesn’t mean that you don’t care, it just means that you stop expecting yourself to handle all this responsibility alone.
To help put this into action, try to let go of the idea that you must do everything perfectly. Good enough is still good. And take time to acknowledge that feeling overwhelmed doesn’t mean that you love them any less.
(If you’re feeling overwhelmed right now, here are 12 tips to help you find relief.)
2. Set boundaries
Saying “yes” to everything might feel necessary at times, but it’s also the fastest way to burn out. You’re allowed to set limits on what you can and cannot do.
One great way toset boundaries is to give time limits. You can say you’ll help for two hours, but then after that you need to step away. You can also set emotional limits by telling them that you love them but you can’t talk right now.
💙 If setting limits is hard for you, explore our session on Boundaries with Tamara Levitt.
3. Take micro-breaks throughout the day
Sometimes, the best self-care is small and intentional pauses. Even just a few minutes can help reset your nervous system and get you feeling like yourself again.
To help give you a break, you could step outside for one minute or close your eyes and listen to a song you love. You could also set a five-minute timer and do nothing.
4. Prioritize your own health
If you don’t take care of yourself, caregiving will only get harder. You deserve to fuel your body and fill up your cup, and it really will help make you a better caregiver.
Some great ways to prioritize your health are to eat nutritious food, move your body in some way for a few minutes, and drink plenty of water. Sleeping a full night is another good way to restore yourself.
💙 Listen to this Restful Sleep meditation with Elisha Goldstein to help you doze off peacefully.
5. Find a support system
Caregiving can feel incredibly lonely, but you don’t have to do it all by yourself. Talking to people who get it—like family and friends—can really make a world of difference.
Other places you can find support are local caregiver groups, often found at hospitals and community centers, and online forums like Facebook caregiver support groups or subreddits. Therapists and counselors are also great resources to rely on.
(If you struggle with asking for help, here are seven tips to help you gain confidence.)
6. Outsource what you can
You don’t have to do everything yourself. If someone offers to help you, take them up on it. If you can afford to delegate even one small task, do it. Outsourcing doesn’t mean that you’re not capable, it just means that you’re smart about conserving your energy.
To help lighten your load, consider doing a grocery delivery service. You could also hire help like a part-time cleaner or a neighbor’s teenager to help you run errands.
7. Reframe guilt into self-compassion
Guilt can be one of the biggest struggles for caregivers., But guilt only drains you more and can actually make you a worse caregiver.
To help you let go of your guilt, try to shift the narrative in your head. Instead of thinking, “I should be doing more,” say, “I am doing my best, and that’s enough.” Also as much as possible, give yourself grace. Being a caregiver is hard, and you’re allowed to struggle.
💙 Consider listening to Self Compassion by Degrees with Jeff Warren if you’re having trouble being kind to yourself right now.
8. Remind yourself that you are more than just a caregiver
Being a caregiver is not the only thing that defines you. You’re still a whole person, with dreams, needs, and an entire life outside of this job.
If you need to reconnect with yourself try to do one small thing that brings you joy, even if it’s just for a couple of minutes every day.
Caregiving stress FAQs
What are the signs of caregiver stress?
Stress from being a caregiver can show up in ways that are easy to dismiss like exhaustion, irritability, forgetfulness, and even just feeling “off.” Over time, this stress can build into something more serious and can affect your physical and emotional health.
If you start to notice that you’re constantly tired, even after sleeping, or that you’ve become more impatient, this might be a sign that you’re experiencing caregiver stress. Headaches, stomach issues, muscle tension, and frequent colds can also be signs, as well as feeling overwhelmed, hopeless, or guilty.
Who is most affected by caregiver stress?
Anyone who provides care for another person can be affected by caregiver stress, but some groups are at a little bit higher of a risk.
Family caregivers—especially those caring for aging parents, spouses with chronic illness or children with special needs—often can feel this strain the most. Also, women are particularly vulnerable because they tend to take on the majority of caregiving roles.
If you’re juggling caregiving on top of a job, parenting, or other responsibilities, the stress can also feel even more overwhelming.
How do I know if I’m experiencing caregiver burnout?
Caregiver burnout is what happens when stress goes unchecked for too long. It’s more than just feeling tired. It’s a deep and overwhelming exhaustion that doesn’t go away even after rest. Many people with burnout feel emotionally drained, disconnected, and like they’re just going through the motions.
Burnout can also make you feel resentful — toward the person you’re caring for, family members who aren’t helping, and even sometimes yourself for struggling. If you feel like it's getting to be too much, this might be a sign that your stress has reached a breaking point and you should consider reaching out for support.
Where can I find support as a caregiver?
Finding support as a caregiver can sometimes feel tricky, especially if you’re used to handling everything on your own. But support is out there, you just have to know where to look.
Here are some places you could check out:
Local community centers, hospitals, and faith-based organizations: These spots often offer caregiver support groups where you can connect with others who understand exactly what you’re going through.
Online forums and Facebook groups: If you need more structured support, these communities can also be great places to vent, ask for advice, and feel less alone.
Recognized organizations: The Alzheimer’s Association, the Family Caregiver Alliance, and the National Alliance for Caregiving offer resources, helplines, and even respite care options.
A therapist or counselor: Professionals can help you process your emotions and find strategies to lighten the load if you’re feeling overwhelmed and burned out.
How stressful is a caregiver's job?
Being a caregiver is one of the most emotionally and physically demanding roles a person can take on. The job requires constant attention, problem-solving, and emotional resilience. Plus most of the time, you get very little to no breaks.
Studies show that caregivers tend to be at a higher risk for anxiety, depression, chronic illness, and even a shortened lifespan because of the effects of long-term stress. Sadly, many caregivers don’t allow themselves to acknowledge just how hard their job is.
If you’re a caregiver, know that taking care of yourself is a necessity, and you can’t keep giving from an empty cup. Your wellbeing deserves to be a priority just as much as anyone else's.
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